(NewsRediscovered, New Yorkshire) Employers responded recently responded to a group of Christians in New Yorkshire who claim that forcing Christians to work on the Sabbath is a clear sign of anti-Christian bigotry. The local businessmen and civic officials gathered in the town square before a group of angry protesters.
"Anti-Christian bigory?" asked a spokesperson, incredulously. "That's just silly. We couldn't care less about their religion. In fact, most of the employers recieving these complaints are Christians themselves, and they've never had a problem with working Sundays. That's why the Pope lets Catholics go to Mass on Saturdays, right?"
"Lies! You hate Jesus!" shouted a protester.
"Now, listen here," replied the spokesman, "If we gave Christians Sundays off, then like 90% of the country wouldn't be working Sundays. Aside from some Jewish delis and whatnot, all commerce and government would need to shut down. You couldn't go to the pool, because all the lifeguards besides Billy Atheist would have the day off. You couldn't go to a restaurant, because most of the waiters and cooks would have off. You couldn't go shopping, because most salespeople would have off. 90% of the population would have the day off, and only 10% would be left to run things to keep them occupied. What would you all do? I mean, society would basically shut down! It would be Church in the morning, then I suppose you'd have to go to your homes, maybe have extended family and friends over, and share a meal or something. Maybe the kids would play wholesome games in the backyard and at the park. Maybe you'd wind up just spending long amounts of time praying. Just, like, devoting the day to God, 'cuz there would be nothing else to do. Is this really what you want? Society shutting down, and you just spending time with your family, friends, and God? No restaurants, shopping, amusement parks?
Faced by this ironclad logic, the protesters returned to their jobs, and find pleasant diversions for themselves on the random days they get off.
No comments:
Post a Comment